Weight Loss Pills and Diets? Put Them All Under Santa's Tree

It's almost unbelievable that the most weight-obsessed society would look up to a really fat man as a cultural icon.  No matter how you dress him up, Santa is a fat pig.  Yes, that's my position.

Santa is problematic.  Not only does he like to publicly showcase his obesity, he laughs about it all the time (in public).  He perpetrates the stereotype that fat people are jolly.  He has been seen with his belly jiggling like a bowl full of jelly.  Hey, it only jiggles like that when he laughs.  The jolly thing again.  I guarantee you it jiggles at other times too.

Don't even start with me about coming down the chimney.  This guy would feel lucky if if could get through a sliding glass door!

Not only is Santa a fat person, but he is in all probability a fat felon.  Somebody who tiptoes around my house in the middle of the night would give me the creeps.  When he comes into houses and drops off a few toys, you can't tell me he's not hiding some family silver in that criminal costume (more about that in a minute) when he leaves.  Did you know Santa is known by many different names?

In the US, he's called Santa.  Other common, well know aliases includes Saint Nicholas, Saint Nick, Father Christmas, Santa, Santy and Kris Kringle.   Germans know him by Weihnachtsmann ("Christmas Man" or "Nikolaus").  Russians call him Ded Moroz ("Grandfather Frost").  He's got to be a felon on the lam.

Just look at the way he dresses!  From head to toe in (what?) red velvet with white fur?  Is his suit made from curtains out of a bordello?  Is that fur real?  Where is PETA when you really need them?   

It's disturbing to think about his relationship with children.  Little boys and girls are supposed to sit on his lap and ask for gifts....really?  First of all, because of all that weight, they'd have to sit on his knee.   Probably way down on it so his kneecap would get dislocated all day long.  It's clear that Santa - or whatever his real name is - has a great deal of influence over all the children of the world.  What is the purpose of that?  Is there an evil plan we don't know about?  Does he want to lead them down the wrong path of life?  Will some children be scarred for life by being labeled "naughty?"

For these reasons and many more too sordid to publish, I award Santa the "2009 Public Poster Person for Obesity."

For this next year, Santa or Kris, or Santy needs to do something!  Anything!  Stop drinking only brand name flavored sugar water.  Change his diet.  Join a program.  Join a support group (Elves just don't do it).  For goodness sake, exercise.  I know it's cold at the location of his hideout, so build an indoor gym.

I'm proposing a complete makeover for Kris Kringle.  Let's get a group together for an intervention.  I suggest he goes from fat cultural icon to the globe's biggest loser.  A symbol known worldwide for his philanthropic works and his incredibly buff figure.  Check it out below.  Wouldn't you invite him to hang around your tree and fireplace?  Forget the milk and cookies and go for some brandy?

What do you think?  C'mon.  Join the movement!  Make some noise.  Speak up.

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Natural Weight Loss - Study Proves We Get Fatter by Eating Low-Fat Foods

Ahhh...the mysteries and tricks of the trade advertising low-fat foods.  Most consumers don't realize that very often the fat in a low-fat food is replaced by sugar.  Recent studies show that - when taking the low-fat food snack choice during movies out or at holiday receptions - people will eat an average of 28% more calories.

If you're already overweight, look out.  The studies also show that obese people (under the same circumstance) consume up to 45% more calories!

Lead researcher Brian Wansink (Ph.D.), in the book, "Mindless Eating: Why We Eat More Than We Think" says, "People don't realize that low-fat foods are not always low-calorie foods," says Wansink. Fat is often replaced with sugar. Low-fat snacks are an average of 11% lower in calories, but people wrongly believe they are around 40% lower.

Another study demonstrated that holiday open-house guests served themselves about a third more of the low-fat chocolates than guests choosing "regular" calorie chocolates.  This is because "people believe they will feel less guilty eating the low-fat foods, so they tend to overindulge, says Pierre Chandon, co-author and marketing professor at INSEAD in France.

The complete set of research studies, published in the November issue of the Journal of Marketing Research, was cited by the Economist as one of two significant noteworthy studies published that month. It is titled, "Can 'Low-Fat' Foods Lead to Obesity?"

For dieters, there's also clear message. As Wansink advises in the book Mindless Eating, "Stick with the regular version, but eat a little bit less.  It's better for both your diet and your taste buds."

My experience with "low-fat" foods has lead me to come to a couple of conclusions.  The first is that the low-fat food generally tastes like it.  Yuk!  The second is, basically, five pounds of salad and dressing is still five pounds of food and calories.

The first part of a perfect diet for everyone is eat less.  Less volume.  Less fat.  Most importantly, less calories.  There's just no way around it.  Forget all the food labels.  Just read and understand the caloric value of the foods you eat.  Consume fewer calories than you did yesterday.  Repeat (within reason).

Guard against the "low-fat" label and the holidays.

Fast Easy Holiday Weight Maintenance Tips

The holidays offer a chance to really gain some weight, don't they.  Here's a few fast easy holiday weight maintenance tips to help you out.

Check out the yummy looking pure fat that has risen to the top of this measuring cup of gravy pictured.  (Pass the gravy...I mean really pass it - on to another person!)

You cannot even imagine how much those extra helpings of gravy and dessert at the holiday table will add to your waistline.  According to a new research report recently appearing online in The FASEB Journal, a diet that is high in fat and in sugar actually switches on genes that ultimately cause our bodies to store too much fat

It's a double-whammy!  It's hard enough to convert  high-fat and high-sugar foods to energy.  It's almost impossible when the job is made much harder because these foods also turn our bodies into "supersized fat-storing" machines.  As a refresher course, you can watch the movie "Super-Size Me."

Scientists recently have shown that foods high in fat and sugar stimulate a known opioid receptor, called the kappa opioid receptor, which plays a huge role in fat metabolism. When this receptor is stimulated (look out!), it causes our bodies to hold on to far more fat than our bodies would do otherwise.

One of the researchers in this latest study (Traci Ann Czyzyk-Morgan) reported, "the data presented here support the hypothesis that overactivation of kappa opioid receptors contribute to the development of obesity specifically during prolonged consumption of high-fat, calorically dense diets."  As usual, this was a study conducted on mice.

Can't mice catch a break?

One group of poor little mice had their kappa opioid receptors genetically deactivated (ouch - that must have hurt) and the other group was normal...for mice, that is.  Both groups were given a high fat, high sucrose, energy dense diet.  Shockingly (LOL), the control group of mice gained significant weight and fat mass on this diet. The mice with the deactivated receptor remained lean, mean, nose-twitching machines.

A standard disclaimer would remind us that the effects of eating more fat and suger may have to be studed more in humans.  Maybe the mice study is irrelevant.

In a grossly understated conclusion, the researchers proclaimed, "this research provides more proof that high-fat and high-sugar diets should be avoided."  Did we really need to fund another study to come to this conclusion?

"In times when food was scarce and starvation an ever-present threat, an adaptation that allows our bodies to store as much energy as possible during plentiful times was probably a lifesaver," said Gerald Weissmann, M.D., Editor-in-Chief of The FASEB Journal. "By taking that opioid receptor off the table (so to speak -my edit), researchers may have found a way to keep us from eating ourselves to death."

The study was reported in the December 1, 2009 edition of ScienceDaily.

So, let's recap some fast easy holiday weight maintenance tips:

• Pass on the gravy
• Pass on the cookies
• Pass of the cakes and pies
• Pass on seconds and thirds
• Pass on late leftovers (pre-sleep fuel, I know)
• Don't overcompensate with 5 pounds of salad

Hey, let's just do our best.  How are you going to get through the holidays?  What are your best tips?  Is this a good reminder?

Weight Loss Diet - The Perfect Plan for Almost Everyone (in Four Magic Words)

Except for someone with an underlying medical challenge (for example, a thyroid problem), there is a diet plan that is almost guaranteed to help anybody - just like you - to shed excess pounds. You just have to pay attention and strictly follow it.

Here's the best way to preface what I'm going to reveal to you. There's an old story about a king who wanted his court to amass all the wisdom in the known world at that time and condense it into a format that anyone could understand. Although his court was able to reduce all the wisdom in the world to a series of 100 books, and then down to one book, the king was not satisfied. He insisted the all the wisdom in the world be reduced to a single sentence that anyone could remember.

After 10 more years of hard work, his court announced the "Wisdom of The Ages" sentence had been prepared. The king, his court and his most trusted followers and advisers gathered to hear this miracle sentence. After a few minutes of absolute silence, the head of the court cleared his throat and delivered the "Wisdom of The Ages" in a sentence anyone could remember:  

"There ain't no free lunch."

The sentence above would have made for a very short article - no matter how true it may be.

The same process has already been followed by thousands of weight loss experts over the last 100 years. These experts have distilled all of the information about weight loss, diets, weight loss pills, ancient and modern diet plans and programs into four magic words.

Many dieters, upon hearing these words, instantly recognize the truth and wisdom in them. These four words create hope, belief and action where many other complicated descriptions have failed. Once you know these four magic words, you will be instantly discern whether or not your behavior is leading to weight loss or weight gain.

Wouldn't it be wonderful to be able to know, at any given moment, if your actions would result in inevitable weight loss? Would it help to know immediately if your behavior would move you towards your goals or away from your goals?

I've spent thousands of dollars and countless hours, days and sleepless nights trying to understand the vast number of secrets available in the weight loss process. I've marveled at others who seem to already know the secrets of slimness. I've read many books, watched videos, and searched the internet for clues.

Finally, the words were revealed to me on a popular web article there for all to see. The words were hiding in plain sight! I just couldn't understand how I could have missed them all this time. I had believed that - like the Holy Grail - they might never be found. For perhaps the first time, you will read here the four magic words of weight loss clearly and in perfect order. You may use them for the ultimate good of your health, for the health of our nation and mankind. You may pass these magic words on to others with no penalty.

If you could hear me now, I'm figuratively clearing my throat to deliver this ancient (and heretofore unrevealed) magical four word formula of weight loss to you.

"Eat less; Exercise more."

Everything else we discuss here will, ultimately, support your ability to implement this simple formula. Of course, you may need a little help. You may need a support group of like-minded people to support your journey. You may need a written eating or exercise plan. You may need the support of a doctor/medical professional. You may need a way to suppress your raging appetite (I've been there...yesterday!).

We'll make sure everything we talk about and review lifts you up to a level at which you will be able and empowered to do these two things in the four magical words: "Eat less; Exercise more."